Recently I have really been struggling with a lot of things. I have been struggling in school. I have been struggling in my social life. I have been struggling at work. But most of all, I have been struggling with myself.
I am one of those people that doesn’t agree with the education system in this country, and because of that, I probably won’t graduate college. Not right now at least. Do I have any idea what I would do if I didn’t finish college? Absolutely not. But I also have no idea what I’m going to do if I stay in college. It seems like a waste of time to me just because I don’t even know what I’m going to use my degree to do. So I’m wasting time and accruing debt? I don’t know how I feel about that. Actually, that’s a lie. I feel like I need to stop wasting my time and see what’s out there in the world and show everyone how awesome I really am. I think that’d be pretty cool.
My friends have been pretty pissed at me lately. I haven’t hung out with anyone in a long while - about a month and a half. I guess that should be a sign to me that I need to make new friends. But the main issue is my friends constantly want to party and wonder why I’m always playing video games or hanging out at home. The answer is quite simple, really. I am doing what I enjoy. I am trying to enjoy my life as much as possible and to stop feeling so bad for myself and to stop being so unhappy because of pointless shit. I love two things in this world that I know of: video games and my family.
I absolutely hate my job. I have been working at Zaxby’s for two years now and it is the worst. I literally can’t even sleep the night before I have work cause I’m so angry that I have to work the next day. I need to stop being so lazy and go find another job. I just have no idea where I want to work.
I don’t know why I’m ranting here. It’s 8:30 in the morning, and I have yet to sleep, but I guess that’s common for me and something I’m used to. I just really want to figure out something about myself. I have been questioning so many things in my life lately, and it’s easier to think about things while writing about them. I just really want to figure out the point of life, the reason I’m here. I don’t know who I am or where I’m going, but I do know that one day I will find the answer to those questions, and I will make my mark on this world.